How are they so far ahead of me?

Welcome back to Prosperaptitude. If you’ve ever wanted to become a better version of yourself, you’re in the right place!

Ever look at some people and wonder how in the world they’re so far ahead of you? The title of the article itself implies a comparison between what you have and what “they” have accomplished which is a problem in itself, but let’s put that aside for a second and discuss why you might not be where you want to be. There may be a few key things you need to be aware of to make sure you’re headed where you want to go.

Definition of Success

The first thing you need to understand is whether you are working toward your own definition of success or someone else’s. What is your definition of success? If you’re not sure, you need to explore this. For example, my definition of success is not having to answer to anyone. Your definition of success might involve being a CEO. If so, our definitions are rather different, and you need to ensure that you’re working towards your own definition of success (or maybe redefine it).

Are You Too Comfortable?

Ever heard of the saying that nothing grows in the comfort zone? It’s true. When there is no challenge, there is no growth. You don’t necessarily have to sign up for the next 10 business seminars. You can start small- search for online courses that will help you get to your next step. Some of these courses won’t even take several hours. The key is to learn and apply because if knowledge is not applied, it is forgotten. You can earn a ton of completion certificates without knowing how to do a single new task. This is especially true for good test-takers like myself.

Use your discomfort of your current situation as a catalyst for action, and take the first step.

Skills

On a related note, taking courses can help build the skills you need to advance your position. It might be true that you don’t have the necessary skills for that next job currently, but it doesn’t always have to be true. You are in control of your own reality, and skill-building is a way to change it.

A few sites that can help you learn new skills for free include:

1. LinkedIn

2. Youtube

3. Coursera

4. Skillshare

5. Google’s Digital Garage

Ego

Take a good hard look at yourself. Are you readily able to accept and implement feedback? Do you find yourself unable to admit your own mistakes? How about depending on the validation of others? All of these traits hold you back.

Constructive criticism is meant to help you learn and grow. If you are able to give it but not accept it, you need to ask yourself why.

Admitting mistakes shows responsibility and humility. I don’t know about you, but I find it difficult to trust people in a position of power who cannot admit their own mistakes. Generally, there is a disconnect between their words and actions.

Finally, depending on other people to make you proud of your own accomplishments can lead to a feeling of emptiness. It is the accomplishment itself that should make you happy, not the validation of others. Their thoughts and values may not be in alignment with yours, so they might not always laud your achievements. Be your own damn cheerleader. You won’t ever regret it!

In closing- let’s revisit the title of this article. Remember how we said it fundamentally invites comparison with others? Instead of thinking this way, consider focusing on constant growth and being proud of your new achievements. You’ll find that you’ll be happier and probably even more successful in the end.

The writer has two graduate degrees: one being in mental health counseling.

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